Pirate Hats

Pirate hats are only to be worn by official, bona fide pirates. Aaaaarrrggghhh, are you a bona fide pirate with the gusto and verve to wear a pirate hat? If so, then shiver me timbers, matey come aboard and try on all the pirate hats that you'd like.

Be sure, you scallywag that not all pirate hats are the same, either. Some pirate hats are made from leather and some from other materials such as cashmere, yellow straw, sea grass, foam, cloth or some combination of dead buffalos, bailing twine, chewing gum and an emancipated tail feather from the rare boo-boo bird.

On the other hand, some pirates were so tough and mean, back in the day, that they would just kill a cow and wear the whole beast on their heads. With time, aging and weathering, most of the cow would wear off and a fitted pirate hat would appear.

Legend has it that off the tip of Antigua, the heathen captain of a doomed vessel named Mary one day slammed a cow and a pelican together to form one of the most fanciful pirate hats ever seen by native man, nor beast. This fanciful pirate hat came to be known as Tom Tom as was treasured by the likes of Black Beard, Blue Beard and Red Beard alike. Blonde Beard preferred lacy purple hats but that's a story for another time.

Yes, pirate hats have always been a symbol of masculinity on the high seas. Whoever held the hat, held the power. In old lore, it was often known that when pirate vessels attacked each other, the crew would go for the captain's hat as a sign of conquest and the battle was over. Of course, the crew would also raid each other's toilet paper supply as well, since this was a hot commodity on the high seas.

In fact, on the high seas & 7 seas, a 6th sense and a sea breeze could get a captain far as long as there was no mutiny to knock off his stylish pirate hat. If there was a mutiny the new captain would take the old captain entire closet of pirate hats as his own. So, you think Imelda Marcos had shoes? These pirates had hats!

And, you can too. So, why don't ye scare up yer best pirate voice and order yourself a butt load of pirate hats today? They will be perfect for International Talk Like A Pirate Day or even Halloween and who knows, you may just get yerself a little booty because of the hat.