A treasure chest is
where any self-respecting pirate places his booty. Without a treasure
chest, a pirate is just another poor sailor tossed about on the
sea, scrubbing his own poop deck.
But, a treasure chest
filled with booty is what makes a pirate a pirate. In the past,
there have been a few female pirates.
The male pirates have
typically fancied the female pirate's chest even more than their
own treasure chest.
Arrrr, but this story will have to wait for another day as there
may be some lasses and lassies hanging around this pages, whose
tender ears dare not hear those tales.
The pirate's treasure chest is typically filled with gold and silver
bullion and bars, pillaged and plundered from other ships upon the
high seas. Pieces of eight, coins, jewelry, goblets and other various
valuables usually overflow the treasure chest. Pirate captains used
to keep their treasure chests in their captain's quarter, under
lock and key.
Since pirates could not be trusted even on their own ships, the captain
usually had a webcam and offshore security monitoring agency eying
his treasure chest at all times. Pirates would try to crawl over and
under the infrared beams protecting the treasure chest but mostly
failed and had to either walk the plank or hang from the yardarm for
their insubordination and thievery attempts.
Now, sometimes ships would become shipwrecked or under fire from
another vessel and the captain would need to escape in a smaller,
swifter craft with his treasure chest and a few trusted pirate crewmembers.
In case like these the pirate's treasure chest may have to have
been buried in a small nearby island.
Now, there has been much debate as to whether pirates actually
created treasure maps or
whether the captain and crewmembers would just assign the whereabouts
of the treasure chest to memory. No matter since the captain would
bury the treasure chest with a GPS tracking device inside and set
up a new webcam high upon the nearest palm tree.
The pirate's treasure chest throughout the ages has symbolized
wealth, even if ill-gotten (in a Robin Hood-esk kind of way) and
the easiness by which that wealth may be transferred from one party
to another without paying taxes upon it. Modern day treasure chests
are called "loopholes in the IRS tax code."
But, nonetheless, back in the day, a pirate's treasure chest was
a thing of beauty. Or, as some liked to call it a thing of booty.